Sailor the Dog 9/12/2004 – 5/23/2016
Rest in Peace, Run, Jump, Fly…..
And her name is Lola. L-O-L-A Lola.
For all but the first fifteen weeks of my life I’ve been THE dog. Ya know? Then last September our house was invaded by this little furball. Ya know that B-word they use for female dogs? Well, ten seconds after meeting this one I could understand why. She is the Bossiest B**** I’ve ever met! At first, I didn’t even want to like her.
Her yap got on my nerves. She runs around like she’s on intravenous Red Bull. And the first thing she does every morning is get all of MY TOYS out of the toy box and scatter them around the house. I guess she wants to make sure that wherever she goes a toy is close by. I couldn’t stand that she was taking my toys. I couldn’t stand that she snapped at me. I couldn’t stand that she wanted All The Attention!
Then, when we took her to the vet, we found out from a broken tooth and other things that the people who had her before us weren’t very nice to her. She probably never had any toys at all. Or enough food. Or any cuddles and kindness.
It suddenly became very easy for me to see all of the good things about her. Her perkiness, her big smile and wagging tail every time she sees one of us, and knowing that like everybody else she loves to be hugged and cuddled.
The happiest day in my life was realizing that “different” is not synonymous with “bad.”
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Memo From: Sailor the Dog
To: Dog Parents Everywhere
Topic: Plastic bags don’t mix with business
We know how it is. Or at least YOU’D better. Dogs have to do stuff every once in a while. Silly humans have a lot of sillier euphemisms (hah! you didn’t think a DOG would know that word) for certain bodily functions. “Do Your Business” is one that I hear a lot. Though Mom and Dad would prefer that I “Do My Business” in our own back yard, sometimes, things are just out of my control.
You understand that? Don’t you Dogs?
The thing is whenever I’m NOT in my backyard, Mom or Dad is right behind me with a plastic bag. They make a stupid face and say “Ewww!” while they’re doing it.
If it’s “My Business” what the heck are they doing messing around in “My Business” with a plastic bag. Do you know what they do with it? They PICK IT UP!
Hey, Dummies. Why would I do all of that sniffing and looking, looking and sniffing, to find EXACTLY THE RIGHT PLACE, when you’re gonna PICK IT UP?
Dang, good thing you feed me and walk me, or I wouldn’t have any use for you at all.
Sailor The Dog